Parenting: Why can’t we do both?

I recently read a blog post focusing on the joys of parenthood & how easily they can be snatched away by constant worry & stress.  It talked about taking an old school approach to parenting.  To think about how we were raised, before technology & judgement became so prevalent in order to ease the burden.   To let kids be kids & to not be a “hover parent”.

All of which I agree with.

However, it also took somewhat of a stab at the mom’s who may do a little more.  The specific example was a mother who does a birthday time capsule each year to give her son as an 18th birthday present.  I don’t think the idea was to guilt any mother for wanting to document things (whether for her child’s sake or for her own).  I think it was more supposed to let mothers know that is not a necessity in order to be a good parent.  BUT it really got me thinking.

Why can’t we do both?

Why can’t I let my kids play in the cul-de-sac until the street light comes on while also doing monthly footprint art?  Let them run around in the sprinkler all day & still bake cookies for their school party?  Be the mom who encourages outdoor, independent play while also being an active PTA participant?

Well, ya know what?  I think we can.

I am 100% on board with the “what would my mother do” concept.  Children thrive when they are allowed to exert energy, use their imagination, & eat dirt from time to time on their own agenda.  I think it is important for them to grow  up learning from their mistakes and “failures”, allowing them the opportunity to figure out how they’ll do it better next time.   Even if that means they learn it by doing something crazy like seeing how high they can climb in the tree & then trying to flip out of it.

But I also think it’s okay to do a time capsule if that is what you really want to do.

As a parent our main focus is to ensure our children always feel loved.  There are many parenting approaches and I don’t really care which you chose as long as you are giving your children the number one thing they need — your love & your time.  Whether that means you do vegan, gluten free & zero screen time or you eat out 3 days a week and have weekly movie nights.  WHO CARES.  Do you, mama.

Do whatever works for your family!

I’m totally that “time capsule” mom & that’s okay.  Just because I choose to document my children’s moments in that way, doesn’t mean I’m going to hinder their growth or independence.  It doesn’t mean I’m going to stress myself out over it or allow it to get in the way of the important everyday moments I’ll share with my children. Nor does it mean I think every parent should be doing their very own time capsules.

I do think it is important to openly share our experiences and be proud of the way we parent. But just because it’s right for you doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. Just because it’s not something that will work for you, doesn’t mean it won’t for someone else. & it definitely doesn’t mean you should put down another parenting style because it’s not what you feel is necessary.  Remember, it takes a village for a reason:  it allows for more hands, outside points of view, and that much more love.  Take advantage of that diversity & embrace that we are all in this parenting thing together.

So do the time capsule.  Or don’t. Either way, you’re the best mama your kids could ask for.  & don’t forget it!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *